You're a savvy queer who's been eyeing a hot trans guy at the monthly dance parties, or the regular cutie you see at all the fundraising events, but how you make the approach?We here at Early to Bed have had many customers ask for our help in flirting and consummating their crush on an FTM, so on Feb.Then, make a concerted effort to not mess up pronouns again. All these questions can be answered by the Internet, so don't treat your date like a private googling session (unless you're supergeeks and that's part of a fantasy scenario). Now, if your date is really, really into discussing social construction of gender, queer critical theory, trans politics, etc., then go for it; it's good to talk excitedly about topics that your date likes to talk excitedly about.If you keep saying the wrong pronoun, though, consider that maybe you aren't ready to be on the date. Educating yourself on these topics will keep your curiosity from accidentally spilling all over your date, and it will also make conversation easier to follow on your end if he does mention things about his transition or past. But if he's not fixated on the topic, then you shouldn't be, either. Don't tell anecdotes about other dates with trans men (or about your trans friends).9 we're presenting a first-ever workshop, How to Bed a Trans Man, that covers this topic in detail.If you can't make it to the shop in person, lucky you, here are seven tips to help you up your seduction game and keep you from inadvertently offending (or just turning off) your date. Don't use the word "tranny." Ru Paul loves it, but you're not on a date with Ru Paul.That would be patronizing, infantilizing, and condescending. Okay, gang, remember our let's pretend game at the top of the post? After the student who challenged, interrupted, and yelled at me and Cox stormed out of the room, a friend of this student informed Cox, who had used a standard pronoun to refer to this person after this person left the room (while Cox observed, with great sensitivity and tact, that some feel very strongly about this issue), that this person's preferred pronoun was "it." And... (Its buddy told the room that "It Gets Better" Project "has done more harm than good.") Queerty has a good rundown, links to the stories at the , UC's student paper, and a link to the online petition created after my appearance.Cox gamely jumped in and offered that she had used "tranny" in the past but that she now recognizes its harm and has stopped using it. What's one of the worst things you can call a trans person? , those other trans people could potentially be traumatized and I would be accused of hate speech. There's a really amazing, spot-on piece about my appearance at U of C by Ari Cohn at FIRE, John Aravosis has offers some great analysis at Americablog, and you can Google around if you want to see what conservative websites and writers have to say.
Because, man, it had its head up its ass." In less time than it would take me to order tea the two trans activists behind me would be tweeting out quotes and launching an online petition condemning the hate speech they were overhearing me use in line at Starbucks. (I realize we played let's pretend earlier this week, Slog, but indulge me.) Let's pretend that I'm standing in line at Starbucks with a straight friend and we're having an animated conversation.There are two trans activists standing in line behind us—let's pretend they're trans activists with a social media presence—and they overhear me tell my straight friend that I met a trans person earlier that same day at a seminar.Some trans people like knowing that their date has been to the rodeo before, so to speak.Others think it's an immediate red flag that you're a fetishist.